Deep breath. We’re walking away.

Screencap of the 30 acres via Google Maps

Screencap of the 30 acres via Google Maps – quite out of date, it’s been farmed in recent years.

I’m a pretty good decision maker. I like to set my sights on something and make it happen. I don’t waffle too often and I can even be a bit rash with my willingness to jump in feet first. When I come up against a decision that is harder to make, I think my brain sort of shuts down. There isn’t a clear black and white answer? What? What is this gray colored problem? I shall consume sugar and cry a lot and watch thirty episodes of Once Upon a Time.

I don’t think a choice without an immediate clear answer automatically means it’s wrong choice — I think often good decisions can be murky and it takes a leap of faith to make them. Still, we found that even though we could get psyched up about the 30 acres, we’d usually revert to nail chewing by the next morning. It would feel more calm and settled and peaceful if we considered walking away. Even though that was a painful thought, it did make more financial sense, too.

We spent Tuesday morning with the architect and he listened to me and didn’t think I was crazy. We now have 2600 square foot plans plus the larger 3000 square foot plans. But there was still a lot of pressure to make a hard and fast decision quick since the bank & county need copies of the plans in order to move forward.

On Wednesday the earnest money was due according to our sale contract, but that morning we weren’t any more decided than we were the day before. So we got in the car and drove to the temple. On the way we got a phone call from the lender. There was a snag — not an insurmountable snag — but enough of one that would delay the whole process a month or two, which was definitely not in the seller’s timeframe. Still, it sounded like it could still work, but it gave us another opportunity to walk.

We drove around a bit in the lovely spring sunshine and by the time we got home, we had decided to let it go. We talked with the seller and he understood — while part of me hopes the land is still available in a month or two, I’m sure it won’t be. It was priced so well and he had two other buyers behind us.

I feel so peaceful and settled about it all. I didn’t even cry.

Meanwhile we’ve got some pretty sweet house plans in a smaller design, plus the 3000 square foot one, just in case. I’m happy we will have more time to think about those and decide what we want to do in a less frantic and rushed manner. And the architect will be happy to modify them as needed.

Now, while I haven’t experienced any regret or sadness over letting the property go, I do feel a little physically ill. But that’s because I need to change my stress coping mechanism from devouring chocolate to plowing through bags of carrots.


  1. Michelle @ needle and nest says

    It sounds like you did the right thing! Something else will most certainly come along, and hopefully by then you’ll have a better sense of which house you want to build. Are you still considering the 8-acre plot?

    • Jessica says

      Yes, the owner is combating a lien on the property though, so we’re waiting to hear how her appeal will go. It would be a great solution, though the house needs work.

  2. Laura @ says

    That was brave! It must have taken faith that something even better could happen in the future. Sending you a hug!

  3. Kristina in GA says

    Glad you feel at peace with your decision. The right property will come along when it’s meant to.

    • Jessica says

      Thanks Kristina, it’s hard to think that’s true, but of course it is. That won’t be the last perfect property out there.

  4. Jessica says

    “I feel so peaceful and settled about it all. I didn’t even cry.”

    Well that settles it for me! As your Internet friend, this makes me happiest.

    I know something great will come along, and like you’ve said, I think getting used to 1400 s.f. for now could be a great experience and a great baseline for your “final” house plans. 30 minutes to clean the whole thing! That’s what I like to hear.

    • Jessica says

      Thank you, yes! I am focusing on the benefits of waiting (and there are many). The kids can’t get over how fast they are done with chores, I think that is balm for being crammed into one room for sure!

  5. Nicole says

    LOL! Plowing through bags of carrots. Loved that! There will be more land and even better opportunities for y’all! I just know it.. Good luck :)

  6. Annie says

    Stuff like this is so hard for me sometimes. We attempted buying a house 5 times before we bought this one. With each one we got to a point where things weren’t working out and we couldn’t kick the feeling it wasn’t the right time. As it happens, none of the houses had been right for us and we just didn’t know it until after the fact. Funny how that works. It’s hard to let things you love go, though. With our house there were so many things that could go wrong with the process (long story because we are freaks) but we felt so right about it that we finally just felt like we needed to do our best and if it worked out it would be where we should be and if it didn’t there was a reason, then prayed about it, went to the temple, and let whatever was going to happen, happen. And here we are!

    I hope things can still work out for this property when the time is right. It looks and sounds awesome. I’d love to see what you do with it!

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